When I woke up this morning to the sound of Big Girl shuffling into our room at 4:45, I knew I was up for the day. Not by choice, mind you, but because about 10 minutes after that her little sister (who is now sharing a room with Big Girl) decided since she couldn't waltz out of her crib to come and "gnuggle" with the rest of the family, she'd scream at the top of her lungs until we plucked her out of her prison and brought her into our bed too.
Anyway, as I lay there sandwiched between both girls, my mind naturally drifted to the two little ones taking up residence in my uterus ('cause why would I want to try to sleep?).
For some reason I have been pretty consumed with thinking about this pregnancy. I mean, I was close to negligent with my other two pregnancies.
With my first pregnancy I was teaching so it was pretty easy not to constantly think about it. I had 200 whining, know-it-all teenagers in my face that I was dealing with so a teeny tiny little baby that couldn't speak back was the least of my worries.
When I was pregnant with little girl I wasn't teaching, but I was chasing down an infant/1-year-old whose sole purpose in life was to pop as many bugs, rocks or dishwasher pods into her mouth as possible before I could shove my finger in her mouth to try and fish 'em out.
I mean, I never drank or smoked or any of the major no-no’s of pregnancy, but I just didn't think about being pregnant. I could have maybe told you what size comparing to produce my baby was, but insofar as kicks and habits and whatnot, I never even thought about it.
Even thinking about the labor and delivery part didn't really freak me out. I'm just one of those who thinks women have been having babies forever, so I guess I can do it too.
Apparently, I'm also one of those people who don't take into consideration the infant and mother mortality rate before the advent of modern medicine, but I'm not gonna examine that too closely.
Unlike the other two times I've been pregnant, with this pregnancy I'm pretty obsessive. I know it's because they're twins and there is naturally an increased risk of complications, but you'd think my "people have been having babies forever" mentality would translate to "people have been having twins forever."
Yea, it doesn't.
Not only can I tell you what size fruit these kids are, I can also tell you what their heart rate was at the last appointment, what kind of twins they are (there are four different types, who knew?) and what physical change they're supposed to be going through during any given week.
The crazy pregnant lady who has taken over who I once was thinks there is something terribly wrong that I don't feel as if there is a Circe du Solie show happening in my midsection all the time.
I scoff in disgust every time I go onto the Internet and there isn't a website dedicated specifically to "what your twins looks like in the womb this week" (yea, I know for a while they're developing just the same as a single baby, but I want to see pictures!).
At this point, I owe an apology to any of those parents I judged for getting an at-home fetal Doppler to hear the baby's heartbeat – I'm so sorry.
I even feel like I should backtrack on that judging I did of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes when they got an ultrasound machine when she was pregnant with Suri. I'd stalk my kids like paparazzi if I had one of those puppies.
And now I've just realized that I've admitted I'm as crazy as Tom Cruise. I'm going to go take a nap.