“Knives Out” is not bad. Lakeith Stanfield is calm and charming. Ana de Armas is lovely and fashionable. There is intrigue. There is a nice twist. It has not one, not two, but three good messages (having Narcan is important if you’re taking opioids, rich people are the worst and redistribution of wealth is best for everyone).
It also has a fatal flaw.
Daniel Craig is in it, and if you know Daniel Craig, you know he is a British man. He was James Bond for a little bit and people seemed to like it very much. He is well-versed in talking like a British person, because he is British.
In “Knives Out,” he plays someone who is not British, but who is a detective named Benoit Blanc and is either Cajun or some other type of Southern, depending on which scene is happening. You can’t really tell, because Daniel Craig’s Southern American accent is so, so, very bad.
It’s like the commercials for KFC where they got all kinds of A-minus list celebrities to be the Colonel, except if instead of Reba McEntire or Jim Gaffigan it’s just Kevin Spacey in that episode of “House of Cards” where he got really drunk in a library and had that whole talk with his friend from college who he experimented with sexually, and also if Kevin Spacey was a British person trying to sound like a Southerner.
The entire first half of the movie was lost on me because nothing else was getting through besides the horrifying cadence of Mr. Daniel Craig.
The good news is that because the whole movie is kitschy, the terrible accent thing can eventually be ignored and the movie can be appreciated.
It’s not like in “The Irishman,” which is supposed to be all serious and good but may or may not be ruined by a terrible job by Robert De Niro, who is allegedly 5’7” and wore lifts to look like a normal height (I have not seen it). It’s not even like “The Wire,” which rules but also has a British guy doing a really bad Baltimore accent.
It’s more like the dubbed-over versions of anime, where everyone just sounds dumb but it’s okay because the show itself makes up for it. Of course, if you watched anime dubbed instead of subbed you’re a coward because you’re not forced to actually watch and enjoy the show instead of staring at your phone, but it’s the best comparison I can think of right now.
Overall, the movie is very good, the final shot is cheeky, Lakeith Stanfield wears a nice jacket, the rich people, who say things like “He’s the black sheep of the family,” lose — just a lovely time. I don’t know how Rian Johnson made this but also made the worst Star Wars movies and “Looper,” but here we are.
Rating: Honestly, Daniel Craig’s accent was just too much so I guess like 8/10 or something?